Touchdown in Mada!

About a week late on posting, but I’m thrilled to say we’ve made it safely to our port in Madagascar for the next 8 months.  Our first day here consisted of welcoming the president and prime minister aboard for a tour, with a celebratory program that followed.  Madagascar is celebrating “The year of volunteer,” and the arrival of Mercy Ships basically started this off.  The president has been an incredible ally for us, offering services we’ve never received in prior field services; they’ve painted and repaired several aspects of a warehouse we need to use, they’re developing means of transportation for people that need to travel from different parts of the country to get screened at the ship.  Praise God for people who are for us. 

A view from our tent at the celebration

I was able to attend the celebration after the president toured.  The entire crew (about 300) had to basically keep in hiding while the tour was happening, so everyone was getting ready and traveling between certain stair cases; it kind of reminded me of something out of Harry Potter.  So the celebration was a large gathering here in Tamatave, located in this large quad area with a stage where several people gave speeches in Malagasy; we understood none of it.  We could pick up “Mercy Ships” every so often.  Some of us walked back with the person who had been briefing us on the Malagasy culture, so he showed us places to go and where to avoid.  He specifically pointed out a clean, attractive looking restaurant and told us none of the MS crew were allowed to go there or even order from that place.  This restaurant was positively notorious for being the place to pick up prostitutes- heart breaking. 

The people are first off, beautiful.  They have a very stoic demeanor; they observe, and can look very serious at times.  If any of you know my default death glare I can have when I’m focused or on a mission- that doesn’t even compare.  Luckily, a smile is usually the key to break that; attempt to converse in Malagasy and it’s like you’re the most entertaining person they’ve met that day- they act very surprised when you spout off a few Malagasy words.  But really, they greatly appreciate any attempt to become more familiar with them as a people and ethnic group.  It’s very sweet actually.

First day of exploring

This week the mission for us nurses is to clean the hospital and start setting up! We literally wiped everything down in bleach, the cabinets, the walls, the bed springs, the toys, even the ceiling- TWICE!  We are welcoming the day crew, who are paid volunteers from Madagascar to basically act as our translators and extra hands around the ship.  They work in the hospital along with several other departments. 

Transporting some suction containers

I became electrician for a day too!  The nurses had a “Bless the crew day” this past week, where we volunteered with other departments while some made cards for all the departments.  I changed light bulbs with 3 other nurses while the Chief Electrician took us under his wing and taught us a great deal of his trade.  His story is incredible.  He and his family lived in South Africa, had to wait years to be accepted to Mercy Ships.  Once they were accepted, they sold everything! They sold their house, cars, and belongings.  He and his wife and kids all came to the ship with two bags each to their name.  They came from a society with some remaining apartheid thinking.  He told us some of his family has disowned them because of the work they do for the poor people of Africa; they don’t think it’s right. 

Talk about taking a step of faith and suffering for the Lord.  I’m blessed to know this man, he has enriched my life.  He’s offered to make us some “real” coffee, not just the ship stuff, and I can’t wait to take him up on that.  I think I said in a previous post, the coffee isn’t quite like the Keurig from home, it’s really not even like the 7-eleven either. Hahaha, but I didn’t come here for the coffee now, did I?

Preparing to set out with the lightbulbs

A few thoughts on worship

Worship aboard the Africa Mercy is an experience of praise I have never experienced before.  On the AFM, you can see that people love Jesus.  People talk about Jesus, you see people praying, countless people with their Bibles and journals out in the café, but once you bring us all together for some worshiping, the community gets taken to a whole new level.

Yesterday marked my second time of worship on the ship, we were worshiping the night before we got into Madagascar.  The first time was my first full Sunday and there was a scheduled time of worship out in the café lobby, an open place where people can congregate on level 5 in the Starbucks café and on deck 6 in midships, but still see down into the cafe.  It fills up quickly and there’s people everywhere, sitting against walls, on the stairs, leaning on the rails.  Someone picks up a guitar, someone maybe gets on the bongo drums, and singing ensues.

The songs are the typical worship songs, some newer ones I don’t know, others are old favorites.  I think my favorite part is looking over all the people from so many different countries, worshiping in one room for one God.  As soon as I close my eyes the ship goes away and all I can see and feel is light and His people worshiping before His great throne.  God smiles and our voices rise that much higher and more harmonious that it has to be close to what heaven sounds like. 

Those glimpses of heaven don’t come often; it’s in the quiet of a morning sunset before we reach the dock in Madagascar, it’s in the vast expanse of the ocean, it’s in the silence of the stars in the middle of the ocean, it’s in a prayer in a different language yet felt just as clearly in the soul as though you were praying it yourself. 

Worship is rejuvenating, it’s what we were created to do in the first place; enjoy our Father.  And that’s all I got to say about that.

This is Ephesians 3:2 written down in the engine room of the ship.
"assuming, by the way, that you know God  gave me the special responsibility of extending His grace to you Gentiles."

Adjusting to life at sea

We are about halfway through our sail to Madagascar, estimated to arrive early Saturday morning, so about midnight on Friday for all my east coast friends.  Ship life has definitely taken some getting used to.  We’ve recently hit some rougher swells; chairs have slid across the room, people’s food swept right out from under them mid-bite.  I will say if you can find a good chair and blanket, the rocking does make for a very peaceful nap.  It almost takes you back to child hood where you got rocked to sleep like a baby.   It’s always cold on the ship, and I did not expect that to be the case, thus I did not prepare well.  I have also prayed for the Lord to provide me with a sweatshirt or sweatpants, and I believe He will give them to me in due time. He knows what I need.

Nursing orientation has been going on all week.  We’re learning the procedures and protocol for the wards and I’m pretty sure everyone is itching to get to Madagascar already.  I just found out that I will be part of Ward B, performing orthopedic surgeries first, then plastics, then VVF (vesico-vaginal fistulas) later on in the field service.  Today we had a general overview of all the surgical procedures we will see on the wards, it was so gratifying to finally talk nursing language again.  It’s been over 2 and ½ months since I’ve worked.

Physically I am doing much better, sea sickness has been manageable, I rarely do anything in my cabin, as it is very tiny and claustrophobic at times.  My bunk mate and I attempted exercising a bit on the 2^nd deck on the bicycle machines, and let’s just say we created our own “ride in the park” with all the swells and dips the ship took.

Emotionally, I had to make some adjustments to my quiet times, as there aren't many private places on the ship to go to for complete quiet. My prayer life has been something I have devoted extra effort to, and I’m seeing fruit.  My time talking with Him is getting longer, sweeter, more personal and intimate.  The community here is continually praying, so luckily it’s part of the culture of the ship.

I’ll share one of my favorite moments so far, then I’ll stop writing.

One of the first nights we were sailing, some friends decided to go out to the stern (the back of the ship).  Several people had some great knowledge of the constellations already and the night was incredibly clear.  We could see everything imaginable: Mars, the Southern Cross, Alpha and Beta, Scorpio, Antarsis (?), the Milky Way, the Clouds of Magellan, even a few quick shooting stars.  It was beyond fascinating.  That was the first time I had been outside to look up at the stars and witness the Southern Hemisphere night sky.  The stars were so much more gripping than anything I’ve seen back home, and no doubt it had much to do with being in the middle of the ocean, untouched by city lights.

Anyway, we spent a good 30-40 minutes up there before people wanted to go inside.  As some straggled away, I asked if anyone wanted to stay and pray with me.  I was so overcome with the fact that this moment was incredibly special, I had no other option but to stand in awe and praise.  The ones that hadn’t gone in stayed out with me, and I just started praying while gazing at the stars and the galaxy that had the Lord’s name written all over it.  The three others that were with me prayed as well, one spoke in her native German language- it was glorious, knowing our Daddy knew every word she said, as clearly as I heard my other sisters praying in English.  As one of us was praying, I had lowered my eyes, I heard the girl next to me gasp!  I opened my eyes and witnessed the BRIGHTEST, SHINIEST  orange shooting star go across the sky.  I can still picture it.  It was one of those moments you immediately feel the Lord’s presence magnify exponentially and your heart becomes so overcome you can do nothing but be silent and stilled.

God showed the four of us an amazing sight, and He didn’t have to.  I did not have the best day emotionally, and He seriously gave me the best “pick me up” hug imaginable.  God has incredible things set for this field service.  The days leading up to it have been challenging, but He’s also led me back to Romans 5:3 “Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And this hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit whom He has given us.”

Indeed, though my suffering may only be emotional and a little physical right now, God’s spirit is at work, and His love never fails.  I can rest in knowing I am being prepared to persevere and build my character which will grow hope.  I can feel this hope will be imperative once we get to our dock.  I have no idea what lies before us, but I know it will be more challenging than anything I’ve ever faced.  We’ve been getting briefings on the culture of Madagascar and the place we will docked is known for being a “sexual getaway” for many foreigners.  There is definitely a power not of the Lord at work there.  The nurses and the rest of the crew are dedicated to working in the Spirit, prayerfully preparing our hearts to love and contribute whatever we can to the people of Madagascar.  God is in ultimate control and I didn’t come here to leave the same person.

Stepping off of my front porch and into Cape Town

My time on Mercy Ships so far has already been one I will never forget.  From falling asleep with a smile on my face the first night, to climbing Table Mountain watching the sunset, to hiking back down in the dark with flashlights, visiting Robben Island where Nelson Mandela was imprisoned and also visiting Simon Town to see the penguins on the beach; and I’m only on Day 3!

P.S. that's a town at the bottom of the hill, right on the ocean.  It just looks like rocks from how high we were.

I remember beginning preparation for this trip back in May and my goal was to approach this experience starting on my knees in prayer and petition for the Lord to move His mighty hand in the place we would be going.  I knew I would be nothing without the Lord and needed Him to go before me.  I also prayed through the verses regarding seeking justice, loving mercy and walking humbly with our God, along with Jesus’ great commission to his disciples.

Those ideals have already been difficult to maintain, and we haven’t even started our field service.  Only having several days to experience Cape Town before we leave, it’s been a rush to go out and explore different things.  All are good things, but going apart from the Lord has taken a toll on me.

I finally was able to devote some time to spend with the Lord on Day 2 of being on the ship, which was when I was able to email all my supporters back home.  Just being able to get all my emotions and joys and worries on paper and process while I prayed was incredibly calming; the Lord is so abundant when He offers His grace.

So I thought I would share some of my realizations.

-Taking the first steps away from my family and really cutting the cord for the first time ever was so gut wrenching, but I could sense the Lord immediately catch me and spur me on.  It felt right.  I stepped off the ledge and chose not to panic and flail and grasp for anything that would slow my fall.  God was faithful and went with me.

-Family has developed a deeper meaning for me.  Seeing real and abundant tears from my sisters, hearing the prayers that were prayed over me before we left for the airport was a new level of the Spirit I hadn’t witnessed before.  There was deep turmoil behind their voices, but each one still voluntarily and gladly lifted me up and let me go.  I was leaving something I knew very well and loved and was comfortable with and enjoyed, to go to something that was unknown.  That was only possible because of the Holy Spirit doing a mighty work in me.

-There is a big, BIG, BIG world out there, bigger than my little life in VA.  There are so many people in this world; older people that travel to African countries for vacation, or to visit their siblings for the first time in their 70’s, people that come out of Senegal that speak such interesting languages, people whose hearts are corrupt and talk down about people that are white because they think we don’t care about black people and we never will. 

-I realized some people still have passion and I crave to be around it and talk about it and learn from it.  I realized how devoid the world is of passion that is righteous and how any passion apart from righteousness is worldly and tainted no matter how good or moral.

-I’ve realized how unique God is: geologically and culturally.  Africa looks so different from anything I’ve ever seen, but yet His fingerprint remains- in how vastly large the mountains are, in the sea lions that play and flip in the harbor, in the way the sun sets on this side of the earth, in how totally small I am, but yet still so loved and seen by a huge God.

Sea Lions tired from playing

-I've realized how quickly I tend to turn my circumstances on myself.  This is really the first time I've sat down to process and let the Lord do work.  My original mantra was coming on this journey starting on my knees in humility, praying and petitioning for the Lord’s hand to move mightily.  So far, I’ve done some things out of selfish ambition to experience Cape Town so I have something to talk about, instead of letting the Lord take precedent and then having Him reveal Himself in whatever activities I get into. 

GOD ALWAYS COMES FIRST

Where I have messed up, there is grace.  My mess-ups aren't my master, I am covered.  In this grace I’m allowed to stand.  I don’t have to cower or lie down or work to regain my salvation.  I stand and there is great confidence in standing in grace.

Pep talk

Disclaimer: Pardon my evident softball nostalgia in this post. 

God is by far the best Coach ever.  These past couple weeks, I've been in need of some pep talks, especially when I've felt like the pressure of this trip has become overwhelming, or I have doubts swarming around me telling me I'm not a good enough nurse, or I'm not experienced enough, or I won't make friends, or I'm going to get lost in an airport somewhere. As silly as some of them sound, they have legitimately struck fear and I have been at war with these lies.

But! 

Like our faithful God, He comes through in our time of need.  Like a good Coach, He's let me work through some anxiety attacks (I've prayed Phil 4:6-7 a lot lately), sometimes coming out successful and other times learning my lesson of what to do next time. Like a good Coach, He speaks at the opportune time, giving me a pep talk that I've craved for the past couple innings and now I'm desperate to hear Him speak.

One quote that has left me with stamina to continue through was from a friend who encouraged me with a saying by Paul Tripp.

"He [God] loves me enough to take me where I would have never wanted to go in order to produce in me what I never could have achieved on my own."

Bam!

My feet are resettled, my heart renewed and swept over in peace.  My vow to surrender my life in full obedience has been reestablished and reminded me that my life really isn't my own. The day I accepted Christ and handed over my life meant I would go through situations that wouldn't look the way I wanted. It meant I would be made uncomfortable, it meant I would experience difficult situations, it meant I would face choices that would make me choose between my family, my friends, my comforts in order to follow Jesus. But the settling fact that I get to remember is that my Coach wins the game.  Ultimately, no matter how dire things look, no matter how stressed I become, my Coach doesn't desert His team. He fights for His players, He avenges the poor calls by the umpire, and He comes out victorious. 

Though I may be a very small player in the game, I choose to trust my Coach.  The experience I am about to embark on is so much bigger than me and it would be selfish to try to make this all about my wants and needs.  Being placed in situations where we are uncomfortable tend to be the places we grow and stretch the most.  I'm so ready to go there.